Sunday, April 5, 2009

Back from the asylum

And...another exam week has come and gone.  Thank God that one's over.  This was possibly the roughest two weeks of my graduate career--I studied more information in more detail and longer than I think I ever have, and it culminated with eight hours of exams on Friday.  I have never in my life been physically tired from a test, even from the hardest ones--but yesterday and today I have slept like my life depended on it.  Now I feel refreshed and--if not quite ready to go back to classes--at least no longer completely depressed about the idea of arriving nice and early tomorrow.  

In between the long (and much needed) episodes of sleep, the weekend has managed to be extremely fun and productive.  My school had a party for the graduate students after our exams Friday night, and D and I were both able to go and dance and enjoy ourselves for a bit.  It was so pleasant--events like this are not D's thing, and in the past whenever I'd ask him to go he would agree but then (often) make my night completely unenjoyable because he clearly did not want to be there.  He would purposely make us late, be visibly annoyed or upset, and I would inevitably let it ruin my evening.  Friday night I was determined to utilize some of the tools I'm learning in recovery and have a good night for myself no matter what he did/said/felt/looked like.  Keeping his mood from affecting mine, as it were, which is a big project for me right now. As it turned out, the evening was wonderful.  I had a great time with my colleagues and enjoyed the night for myself.  While D probably wasn't the most thrilled person in the world to be dressed up and introduced to dozens of people in a loud room, he was polite and enthusiastic and lovely, and the best part was I think I would have enjoyed myself even if he weren't (though it was certainly an added bonus).  

Yesterday I took advantage of my study-free day and found some new professional-wear for my internship this summer (what I had was beginning to get too small or had moth holes).  It's amazing what a good pencil skirt and heels can do for my mood.  Tomorrow it's back to the grindstone, but for now I'm just going to sit back and enjoy my momentarily un-scheduled life. 

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